MERI IRINDIRA NIKULA

It has only been a month.
The vibrant experiences I had with you are still pulsating within me, very much alive.
Oh, Madrid Madrid... what a short yet intense love affair we had! ​​

I never expected to love it so much, the lively Madrid. But there must be some latina blood rushing through my veins! Even though being such a sensitive being who needs a lot of time alone (very Nordic), I do talk with a very loud voice, I do wave my hands when I speak and... I love creating in various spaces with other creatives. 

Since meeting each other in 2018 for Art Ii Biennial in Northern Finland, we wanted to meet again and make something together, me and Raquel Sakristán, a fearless artist and a beautiful soul. We made 3 collaborative pieces in those 3 days I was in Madrid. 

The one I wanted to introduce to you today, is The Web. Something we could call a performance-installation. It is all interwoven into a piece that both shapes a public space as well as makes it come alive with our presence: creating the web, my singing, the connections we make with the people there. 

This time we didn't announce it as a performance, it was simply time for us to test this concept. We met at Matadero Madrid, a huge historical complex, that is now dedicated to culture (art classes, exhibition spaces, events...). I was impressed how they had conserved such old buildings and opened their doors to art! Left everything that could be left as it is, renovating what necessary.

When in the process, people started stopping by to follow our process. We had some very touching moments after this first try-out - our small, spontaneous audience was already international, from Korea, Switzerland... transported together into a realm of pure presence. There were those precious moments when we breathe the same magic for a moment.

Having the spectacular designer's dress from Israel Rodríguez, was also such a gift. I haven't had much contact with the fashion world, it mostly scares me to be honest, but wearing this dress was very special. Pure silk. Spectacular sensation. A girl who saw me going to the bathroom of the exhibition space for changing my clothes said to her father: ''oh dad, look, a princess!''

Even the light came to us at the right moment, creating the perfect natural effect. Some people asked if we had actually planned it so. 

As the autumn rolled along and my schedule got more busy, it became clear to me that I was heading towards exhaustion... AGAIN! Just after having gathered back my strength during the summer when I was not working. Even though I definitely should know better... Still. Feeling the overwhelm creeping in.

 I am right here with you, in spirit, as a human, on this path of constant change.

For your Inner Peace, Balance and JOY, 

​Meri Irindira

 
Things have started flowing to and through me in a more peaceful, fulfilling and meaningful way! One beautiful project I have been involved with recently is a film,  'Precious Balance Walk'  with a group of individual performing artist, who each create a ritual for healing the waters. In Malmö, the very Southern point of Sweden (over the sea, you can see Copenhagen!) I was interacting directly with the sea, through my voice and movement, merging with it. This was deeply inspiring experience that took my work as a healing artist to a new level.

As the forests are burning around the world and the floods and storms rage on Planet Earth, I have become increasingly aware of my role in it all. WE ALL need to start taking a stand and living in alignment with our true values. Is your mind, heart, body and soul all supporting each other, walking on the same path? We are being asked to examine ourselves, our motives for doing things, our emotions, our state of being within.

It is increasingly important for me to connect directly with the Earth. Becoming aware of our intimate connection with nature. Immersing myself in water, warm or cold. Looking deep into my inner state of being: what does it reflect to me? How do I deal with my inner turmoil? Do I take responsibility for my part in every interaction, even when feeling like someone else is to blame? We cannot hide anymore, not from ourselves, not from earth other - not from the world. 

With new  depth and conviction, I am inviting you to start treating your inner world, your body, mind and soul as a microcosm that reflects the greater whole. How can you treat your world better? We need to wake up to a clearer understanding of the interconnectedness of everything. And instead of letting the turmoil take us down and lose hope, WE MUST RISE IN OUR POWER and become even more committed to being the change we want to see in the world. Step by step. Realisation by realisation. Your courage inspiring courage in others. 

Sending you infinite courage and gentle self love. 

From my Ocean to Yours, 

​Meri Irindira

​

However, there has been a sense of needing to be EVEN MORE truthful to my deepest desires. There has still been some fear lurking around, pushing me into trying too hard, instead of simply TRUSTING that the path will clear as I gently walk on.

When burning out, we are forced into absolute rest and silence. From this unexpected call to enter yet another cocooning phase (oh, never expected that there would be the need for this now!!) some delightful new discoveries has been made. For me this means opening the doors to some Secret Gardens within I have not fully allowed to become visible yet! 

I am coming back to honouring my extremely sensitive nature.  There has still been that inner expectation that I should be doing more, trying harder, working more hours to 'make it' as an artist and healer, make a product out of who I am. It feels like what it sounds like... very very hard. I simply cannot function from this frame of mind.

At the same time, the devastation is still spreading across the Earth, our home. There are those who do not recognise the damage we are doing to our home, Mama Gaia, Planet Earth. There are STILL those who are blinded by their greed and short sightedness. Some in very powerful positions.

This brings me to my other renewed dedication - to work even more closely WITH NATURE, to make my creative and healing arts intertwined with the living connection to the Earth. The elements, trees, plants, living organisms. Humans as a part of that web of life, not separate from it.

​Breathing with you.
In silence, in movement, in sadness and pure joy​,

Meri

As I was a child, I was observing, wondering, making my own conclusions. Often, not feeling like I really belong here. This feeling has followed me through out my life. Feeling like an outsider in most situations, not really knowing how to be a human in today's world. 
 
Being a deeply fragile human being is a beautiful, yet such a challenging experience. No matter how powerful we might feel at times, it is inherent in the human experience to be fragile. We start out as helpless, tiny babies - and we all die, no matter how strong or successful we might have been at some point in our lives.  

When I started allowing the spiritual world to take more space in my every day existence, things started shifting. Sense of DEEP BELONING started to replace the feelings of being an outsider. Becoming aware of my energetic, spiritual essence has made it easier to have gentle compassion towards the transient nature of being human.

For me being a 'spiritual being having a human experience' is a continuos journey of courage and expansion. A journey into deepening compassion and understanding. And yet, never arriving to a specific destination.

It is a process of ​accepting all the human flaws, mistakes and everything we don't really want to acknowledge as a part of who we are. It is a process of embracing all of the shortcomings, the pain and the vulnerability and loving yourself, no matter what. No matter how desperate you might feel at times, no matter how deeply hurtful you might have been towards yourself - and other's.

Being  spiritual being having a human experience is about accepting that it is challenging for us all and even though we might have moments of great peace, bliss and pure alignment, there will always be moments when the human parts of us cry out their pain. And we must hold ourselves. We must cradle and caress all of those part of ourselves. As only with love will those parts start letting go. Only by loving ourselves through the humanness can we resurrect ourselves into wholeness. 

Tomorrow we will start the very first Art Meditation - 7 Day Experience. It has been deeply thrilling and often a truly blissful process of creation! Diving deep into the paintings of Pirkko Mäkelä-Haapalinna and letting my Vocal Blessings move through my whole being, has been a transformational journey for me. ​Have a look, take a minute to watch this short trailer and if you feel called to participate, join me in this deep dive through the mystery into greater peace.

​Hold your human self close.
​
Bless your sweet, gentle essence with all the kindness and love you can allow in.
It is a precious process of de-conditioning lifetimes of hurt.

It is a journey of allowing yourself to resurrect, to rise anew,
to face the hardships and shortcomings of your human self and still,
always, allow a new beginning to birth yourself again and again.

As long as you live.

With love,

​Meri

This seemingly simple idea has many layers.
There are some secrets and deep challenges embedded into it.
What does it even mean, you might ask, to be MORE of who you are -
​ are you not being yourself already..? 
​
Yes. Yes you are, already being you! I am who I am. However, we are multilayered beings and many of those layers we might not even be aware of. Layers of social conditioning, what has been expected of us. There are layers of the culture we are born into. Ideals of a good life, concepts and structures that have shaped us and how we respond to the world around us. 

​Who we truly are, then, becomes a little trickier to define! For me it has felt like peeling layer after layer of expectations that I have had for myself. Expectations based on how I have seen myself and the surrounding world. Finding new ways to see this shared reality, I am opening more and more for living in a constant state of unfolding.

I believe we live in a giant sphere of mystery. ​

Would you like to get more deeply connected with your inner world, your inner voice? I would love to go on this journey of discovery and reconnection together with you! It has been my passion to let more and more healing frequencies come through my voice and now I want to guide you into using YOUR VOICE as a tool of reconnection and energy healing.

​Ask your inner knowing if this is for you and trust that voice. My deepest wish for you is to find YOUR PATH of highest knowing and least resistance. It is a challenging but beautiful experience to be here as humans and I want to celebrate this life with all it's juicy variety.

​Much love to you on this Super Sunny February day!
​
May Your Uniqueness Shine Bright.
​
Meri

​The little forest next to our house is full of life. There are many visitors that come to us. The biggest guests I have started to receive more regularly are MOOSE. Yes... there are moose that walk around our house, taking a little bite here and there, of the surrounding trees. It is a rather majestic sight, those huge animals, leisurely walking around and about! (They come in the safety of the dark, so no photos to share, unfortunately).
​
As I have been admiring the increasing number of animals and their traces, sometimes bringing clear messages,  the realisation came to me: in a sense, I am pathfinder. I am here to share the guidance I am receiving, so that many more would find the courage to follow to their own intuition. 

​
​Close your eyes,
​take a few deep breaths
and let this
​VOCAL BLESSING for 2019 move through you:

​

I listen to the Vocal Blessing daily and read the message regularly, to keep on track. It is designed to align you with your Core Essence as well as the energies highlighted this year. It connects you with a deeper sense of purpose and gives greater clarity on what you need to focus on, to stay in alignment with your purest essence. 

Meri

This year has had a refreshing feel of newness to it for me!! Somehow... there seems to truly be a New Beginning, something I have been preparing for since a few years now. I want to show up even more fully with the gifts I have to share. It is becoming so clear now, how we are here to accelerate each other's processes, to support, encourage and embrace each other through the often challenging times on Planet Earth.

For me, to be truly FREE, I need to be able to embrace both birth and death, religion and new age, the beauty and the beast of me. I can be both wildly crazy as well as profoundly delicate. And so... it is. And so I am. 

Sharing part of a process I am working on, with a visual artist, Pirkko Mäkelä-Haapalinna, whose work resonates with me strongly.  Through our collaboration, I am going deep into the themes of religion, what it has meant for people (women!) through the ages and how we commit to things, both human and divine. With Pirkko deeper questions are allowed to exist. The very questions of our existence. The spaces within and between our first and last breath. 

Let my voice guide you into the depths of who you are. 
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Meri

It has been a very intense year for many, 2018. My experiences have been breaking me open time and time again. There has been continuous sense of unraveling who and what I am to recreate myself, over and over again. It has been very hard at times, but whenever I truly, TRULY drop in and listen to my soul's essence, there is always Gentle Grace to surrender into. 

With a soft heart I am giving thanks to all the highs and lows, the bliss and the chaos of 2018. It has been an important year and more is being revealed to us as we continue on our journeys. 

One of the guiding lights in my life is my amazing daughter Mimi. Almost every day there is a moment when I feel a sense of wonder, as sense of amazement of being her mother. The idea that I am a mother to someone... and that she would be such a glorious, brilliant, sweet and intelligent being! What a miracle! To end this year of revelations on a happier note, I share with you a picture of Santa that Mimi drew. Such a whimsical creature!  

With Love, Warm Heart and Radiant Soul, 

​Meri

This year the darkening season hit me hard. I thought I had conquered my shadows and achieved some state of inner peace, but something felt off and I fell into a mild depression. My mind was confused: where was this coming from and why was I still experiencing this..?!

We need to balance the overpowering energies of continuous striving. Darkness is that feminine principle of non-doing. Pure presence. Being enough, saying: it is ENOUGH now. Enough of consuming, enough of 'making more' enough of believing that 'continuous growth' is an important value above all else.

Continuous striving is part of the sickness we face in our human world and it is hurting us as it is hurting the planet. We know this. And yet... it is hard to embrace that darkness as we have learned to fear it. We have learned to fear the feminine essence and make it 'less than' the masculine. We have been taught that only light is holy and healing. But most of the universe is dark matter.  Darkness holds the seeds. In the womb it is dark as well. Darkness is nurturing, if we learn to let it be so and surrender into the healing it offers us. ​

As a child I loved lying down in the dark of the winter, on the bed of snow, looking far into the starry skies. This filled me with pure wonder and happiness! Such a simple joy with such a profound effect. The snow with it's icy sparks... has always given me such a sense of wonder and magic.